Taking Care of Kids IS as Hard as it Looks
by Paranoid Crack Abuser
Summary: Kagome is going for a buisness so that means Inuyasha has to take care of their daughter. Problem is that kids ask too many questions, are way too hyper, and annoying. Can poor Inu take care of one hyper kid? Rated T for Language


This is just a little one chapter fic with Inuyasha taking care of his daughter. They are in modern time but there are demons and humans in the world. Inuyasha is currently in Tokyo, Japan.

Taking Care of Kids IS as Hard as it Looks

Normal P.O.V

A little half-demon girl ran down the stairs. Hurriedly trying to get to the bottom. Her long raven black hair streaked with silver flowing behind her. Her silver puppy furry appendages flicked from side to side at the noise of the clanking of high heeled shoes walking to the door. She almost reached the bottom until she tripped and she shut her eyes tight, waiting for the impact of the ground. Suddenly, two muscular arms caught her frail little body from falling. The little 5-year-old girl opened her honey brown eyes and was greeted by the sight of her father.

His waist length silver hair was tied into a low ponytail and his silver ears that sat on his head twitched at the sounds of footsteps. His golden amber eyes looked at the little girl in front of him and he smirked. The child gave him a lopsided grin. He set her down and a female voice spoke from behind them, making both their ears twitch to her direction.

"Are you ok sweetie?" The raven haired woman came down to her level and checked her over. She was wearing a formal pale blue suit with white high heels.

"I'm ok Mommy! Daddy caught me before I fall!" She grinned and her mother gave her a hug. (**Haruki means ****sun, sunlight, radiance, shine, & life).**

"Now you be a good girl for mommy alright?" Haruki nodded and her mother gave her a peck on her forehead. Her mother stood and faced her father.

"I don't see why you have to go to this business thing" Inuyasha grunted. Kagome sighed and she wrapped her arms around him in an embrace which he gladly returned.

"I'm sorry Inuyasha but I have to. Naraku Onigumo just won't leave me alone! He won't stop till all my businesses are run down... He wants to discuss something over in Osaka" Kagome again sighed and buried her face in his muscular chest

"Then why the fu- I-I mean why doesn't he come here?!" Inuyasha said, learning to hold his language ever since Haruki's first word thanks to Inuyasha. Kagome gave him a warning glare.

_(Flashback)_

"_Who's my little coocoo? You are!" A 24-year-old woman sat there cooing her daughter. The 7 month baby sat there in her high chair gurgling and babbling nonsense. The baby had two little silver puppy ears and her thin hair was raven black. But if you looked really close, you could see tinges of silver. Kagome sighed happily at her child. Strong arms wrapped around the woman, who was, by now, used to the gesture. _

_She turned around and met the lips of her husband. He kissed her lovingly as she wrapped her arms around his neck. He circled his arms around her thin, but curvy waist. He deepened the kiss and ran his tongue across her bottom lip, asking for entrance which she happily accepted. She tangled her hands in his silky silver hair. Their tongues danced together until..._

"_Asscheeks!" A little voice said. The two bodies froze._

"_Asscheeks! Asscheeks! Asscheeks!!!" The little baby squealed and giggled in delight. She clapped her little hands together and squealed again. The parents separated and stared wide eyed at the little girl who was continuously repeating 'Asscheeks'._

_Kagome's chocolate brown eyes averted from the baby to the man who was grinning sheepishly at her. He chuckled nervously and said,_

"_You know kids, growing up so fast" He scratched the back of his head and looked at the ceiling, avoiding the glaring eyes of his wife._

"_ASSCHEEKS!!" The little Haruki squealed._

_(End of Flashback)_

"Mommy... I doesn't want you to go" **(By the Way, I know that the sentence has grammar problems but since Haruki is a child she doesn't have much proper grammar)** the little voice said. Kagome came out of her lover's embrace and picked up the little girl and held her tight.

"Oh baby... I don't want to go either" The mother held her daughter close, "But I have to. How about when I get back, me, you, and daddy go get some ice cream ok?" The little girl brightened

"Yeah! Me wants Rocky Road!" She said happily and Kagome gave her a nice, big, smooch on her daughter's cheek. The sound of car horn could be heard from outside of their nice house. They lived in a nice neighbourhood that was quiet and peaceful.

Kagome sighed and set her daughter down and hugged her husband tightly

"I hate being away from you..." Inuyasha whispered softly in her ear.

"I do too Inuyasha..." She gave him a sweet, chaste kiss.

"I love you Inuyasha" She smiled at him.

"I love you too" He kissed he but another honk outside interrupted them. Kagome separated from him and grabbed her suitcase.

"All the info you'll need is on the fridge, also numbers are there too. If you need extra help call Sango okay? I love you two and I'll call you as soon as I reach there okay? Bye!" Kagome hurriedly gave the two quick kisses and opened the door. A nice, sleek, black limo was there and the butler came and took her bags. She waved at them good-bye and entered the car. Inuyasha, carrying Haruki, stared at the car as it drove away and was no longer in sight.

They entered the cozy house when suddenly, Haruki whimpered.

"What's wrong?" Inuyasha looked at the little girl in his arms worriedly.

"I miss Mommy..."

"Don't worry; she'll be back before you know it. How about I fetch you a snack?" Inuyasha replied to his daughter. _'Better to get her mind off her mom...Kagome...' _Inuyasha's heart saddened from being away from his mate.

"Ok!" She leapt out of his arms and ran ahead to the kitchen. Inuyasha followed and found her on one of the counter stools. He looked over to the fridge and various notes were placed on it, sticked back by a magnet. One of the notes was info on Haruki. It said:

_Inuyasha, make sure you give Haruki a bath and bed in 8:00. Give her a glass of warm milk before she sleeps and read her about one or two storybooks._

_Feed her Snacks every few hours: Cinnamon apples, Celery sticks, Fruits salad, Pudding, or anything else but make sure not to give her too much sugar. _**NO PEANUT OR WALNUTS SHE'S ALLERGIC**

**NO SWEETS OR SHE WILL GET ****REALLY**** HYPER**

_There's lasagne in the oven for dinner tonight._

_Head over to Sango's tomorrow and she'll give you a day full of plates for the day I'll be back late tomorrow._

_Love, _

_Kagome _

Feh, I knew how to take care of my own daughter. Even if it was his first time taking care of her on his own... but he could manage...right?

"Daddyyyyyyyy, I'm hungryyyy" His daughter whined.

"Umm... how 'bout some...pudding?" He said looking back at the note.

"No" She replied.

"Umm...... celery sticks?"

"No_" 'Think Inuyasha THINK! What's the best food everybody loves...?'_

"RAMEN" He blurted out.

"YEAH! I love ramen!" She smiled and Inuyasha sighed in relief. He went over the cupboards and found the right one.

"Chicken or Beef?" He asked staring at the types of ramen.

"Hmmm..." Haruki made a face as if she was making a hard decision. Inuyasha chuckled and waited for her response.

"How's about you take chicken, I take beef and I'll let you have some of mine. That way you can have both" Inuyasha said, making a solution and ending her thoughts on which to choose. She smiled and nodded. He grabbed both types of ramen and he went over to the automatic liquid boiler and added some water in it. He pressed POWER and turned it for three minutes. His daughter was humming a tune that Inuyasha didn't recognize. "Daddy?"

He looked at her, "Yeah?"

"What's pee made out of?" If Inuyasha was drinking water, it would have been out 3 seconds flat! What on earth possessed her to ask a question like that? Inuyasha looked at his daughter and she waited for his response. Then the boiler dinged and Inuyasha realised a breath he didn't know he was holding. _'Saved by a...boiler'_

He stared at the boiler for a bit before He opened the instant-ramen and poured the hot water in the noodle cup. He gave her chopsticks and she quickly began eating her food. I reached to grab mine until Haruki asked another question.

"Daddy I wanna know...how did I come? And what about Taro (He is Miroku and Sango's child)? How did he come? And you daddy! How do you make babies" She asked slurping on some noodles. Inuyasha stared at her with wide eyes. He didn't notice he dropped the still hot noodles on his pants where his best friend lives. Damn children and their questions. May God forbid it all.

"Mommy said that she used magic baby powder to make me but then I asked her why is Auntie Sango getting a really huge and Mommy said that Auntie Sango ate some magic baby powder and is growing a baby! Daddy I want to have a baby!"

She said all in one breathe. At the last statement, Inuyasha choked on his chopsticks and started coughing madly. He ran and got some water. He was about to get a cup but he just used the jug instead and drank the whole thing. Haruki laughed and stared at her father. He came back and sat down.

"Umm... Uhh..." Inuyasha sat there at a loss of words. "Ummm when you're older"

"Daddy Uncle Miroku said that you need to have sex!" Inuyasha sat there shocked but his mind boiled with anger _'I'M GONNA KILL THAT *&^%$# *&^%$# #$%*( *&^%$##$%##$%% $%%$$%^&*^ (*&^%$# %*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_'

"Don't listen to what Uncle Miroku says. He just had some problems." Inuyasha gulped and stared at his noodles.

"Then daddy, why is poop brown? Am I really a girl? Can I change into a boy? Mommy has balls on her chest but I don't. Why? I want balls on my chest! Taro says that they are called boobs. But I heard this man call another man a boob. What's the real boob daddy? Can I call you boobs? I wanna make Uncle Miroku have boobs! But he says he already got some. I told him if I can have some and he said later. Daddy do you have some boobs? I want some boobs Daddy!" She said this all quickly in one breath. But she wasn't done yet.

"Daddy how do YOU pee? I pee sitting down and it comes out from my wee-wee! Do you have a wee-wee daddy? Taro says that his wee-wee is like a stick. How is that daddy? My wee-wee isn't a stick! It looks like folded paper daddy! I want a stick daddy! But how does it come out? Daddy do boy wee-wee's get hurt? Daddy you are so silly!" She pointed to his buddy downstairs, "You spill ramen on your pants!"

He looked down and noticed that his buddy was burning from the boiling hot noodles. The burn all came to him at once.

"HOLY $%#*!!!" Inuyasha ran around and fell to the ground.

"Stop, lie, roll, stop, lie, roll" Inuyasha rolled on the ground and Haruki squealed and joined him on the floor, thinking it was a game. She giggled in delight and rolled around into the living room. Just then, the phone rang and Haruki got up to get it. Poor Inuyasha was still rolling on the ground in pain. With Haruki, She answered the phone and heard a female voice,

"Hello?"

"_Hey sweetie, it's Mommy!" _

"Mommy! I miss you!" Haruki was delighted to hear her mother's voice.

"_I miss you too! How are you and Daddy doing?" _

"Daddy's rolling all over the floor Mommy!" She giggled and her mother chuckled from the other side of the phone.

"And he won't stop Mommy! Me and Daddy were also talking about stuff!" Haruki giggled.

"_Oh? What kind of stuff?" _

"We talked about how to get babies and sex!" Haruki squealed, still not knowing the meanings behind those words.

"_WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!?!??!"_ Her mother's voice yelled from the other line.

"Yeah! And he said a funny word too! He said '$%#*'!! And he's here too!" She handed the phone to her father who was oblivious to the conversation that just occurred.

"Hello?" Inuyasha said.

"_INUYASHA YOU F******* BASTARD!!! WHEN I GET MY F****** HANDS ON YOU I WILL F*** YOUR A$$ TO HELL!!!! I'LL CUT YOUR F******* BALLS OFF AND SHOVE 'EM DOWN YOU F******** THROAT!!!!" _Inuyasha held the phone away from his sensitive ears.

"What the hell did I do?" Inuyasha replied, not knowing the reason his wife was shouting angrily over the phone. Then he heard a male voice asking her to get off the phone so that they can continue. Being a guy, he took the wrong idea.

"Kagome who was that?!"

"_That was Naraku, now stop changing the subject and tell me why the hell are you talking to my daughter about HOW TO GET FRICKIN' BABIES?!?!" _

"Hey! What the hell are you doing with him Kagome?! And what the hell is he-"The end of Kagome's sentence finally reached his head. "Wait what? Babies?! I didn't talk about no frickin' babies!!"

"_Oh really? Why don't you go ahead and ask your daughter hmm?" _

Inuyasha looked over to his little girl that was coloring on some construction paper on the ground. It was messy and had 4 funny looking blobs on it. All of them had spaghetti hair that either went up or down. There were three giant blobs that used up half the page. Two big blobs were holding hands, one with white hair that went up and down and had over-sized yellow eyes. The other one had black springs going all over the place and two brown eyes with noticeable different sizes. He figured it was him and Kagome. Next to the him-an-Kagome blobs was a slightly smaller one that had Kagome blob's hair and Inuyasha blob's eyes. He could guess that was Haruki. She was holding up a miniature blob that looked like her. Inuyasha stared at the photo that the little girl was drawing and failed to notice that his wife was still on the phone.

"_Inuyasha? Inuyasha? Inuyasha Inutaisho Takahashi you better answer right now!...You're such an ass! I can't believe you! I'm hanging up!"_ Inuyasha's senses came back when the phone went dead.

"Kagome? Kagome?! Shit!" Inuyasha cursed under his breath. He placed the phone back in the slot and ran his fingers through his silver, silky mane. He walked over to the couch and plopped himself down. He sighed and looked at his daughter who was putting up the final touches to her drawing which seemed like a sun. He glanced at the digital clock that was sitting on the coffee table that read 4:33. _'I guess we could head over to the park'_

He felt a light poke on his chest and he looked at the source of that poke. Haruki stood there smiling like she won a prize and shoved her blob picture to his face.

"Daddy! Look at my picture! Is it pwetty?"

"Yes it's very pretty!" His daughter beamed.

"You see here?" She pointed to the small blob that the Haruki blob was holding. He nodded and she continued,

"Me, you, and Mommy had a baby!" She smiled happily. Inuyasha grinned at her innocence. _'If only she knew the meaning behind that sentence'_

A ring echoed throughout the house and Haruki rushed to the door. The door revealed a tall black hared man that was tied into a small ponytail that ended at the nape of his neck, violet eyes that always had humour dancing around it, and had a plain grey shirt and jeans to go with it. Next to him was a five-year-old grinning boy that had a similar appearance to the man next to him except he had almond colored eyes and his hair was more or less shaggy.

Haruki grinned, recognizing the two people before her.

"Uncle Miroku! Taro!" She stepped aside to let them in the house. They entered and Taro grinned at Haruki and she smiled back at him. She led them to where her father was sitting. Though it looked like he had fallen asleep. Miroku grinned devilishly and ran off to the kitchen. He came back holding some whipped cream and a feather. He crouched over to us and motioned us **(Haruki & Taro)** to get closer to him. We leaned in, but Haruki could easily hear him as he whispered because of her extra-sensitive dog ears while Taro was only human.

"Do you guys want to learn the art of fun?" He grinned devilishly. The two children nodded.

"Watch this" He slyly and carefully came next to Inuyasha and pulled out the whipped cream. He made a 'shh' motion at us and brought his index finger to his lips. The children nodded and watched curiously. He squirted the whipped cream slowly on Inuyasha's hand that fell on the ground. He made sure not to make noise or Inuyasha's sensitive ears will pick it up for sure. When it seemed like cake full of whipped cream, Miroku took the feather and started wiggling Inuyasha's nose with it. The sleeping man's nose scrunched up but calmed again. Miroku rubbed it around longer and soon enough, Inuyasha's whipped cream hand lifted up to scratch the itch away but instead smeared whipped cream all over his face, alerting him and waking him up. It took a few seconds to process what was going on until his face became beat red and he shouted the name loudly,

"MIRROOOOOOOOOOKKKKUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!"

* * *

"Ow Inuyasha did you have to hit so god damned hard?!"

"Watch it! The kids are here!" Inuyasha scowled at him. Miroku had several bruises and an ice pack to his head. They were at Shibuyu Park with the kids playing on the playground. Suddenly, Haruki came running to her father shouting 'EW,EW,EW' over and over again. Inuyasha looked worriedly at her and lifted her to his arms.

"DADDY!! Taro touched my BUTT!!" She buried her face in his chest and Inuyasha sent a killing glare at Miroku. If looks could kill, Miroku would be ten feet under. Miroku just grinned sheepishly and made Taro say sorry to Haruki. They went off playing again while Miroku got some extra bruises.

* * *

_With the kids... _

"Papa says that Mama is gonna give me a baby brother" Taro grinned happily, taking in some pride,

"Aww, lucky! I want a baby brother! I'll tell mommy to make one!" Haruki smiled and ran over to the swings. She sat down just sort of sitting there, waiting for Taro to catch up. He ran over to her and sat down on the next unoccupied swing. They looked around and then saw a couple making out under a tree.

"EWWWWWWW!! GROSS! Why would anyone want to kiss?!" Haruki made a disgusted face while Taro grinned,

"I think it's great! It says how much you really love someone! Plus you get to touch somebody else!"

"Nu uh I don't wanna do that!" She looked like she was thinking and then her eyes widened in shock.

"Does that mean I have to kiss Daddy on the lips?! I love him a lot and sometimes I see Mommy and Daddy do it... That means I also gotta kiss Mommy!"

"I dunno if it's true or not..." Taro said and shrugged.

"Whatever let's go to the slide!" She grabbed onto Taro's hand and pulled him to the slide. But she didn't notice the red tint that appeared on poor Taro's face.

"O-ok..."

* * *

"What is wrong with you?! If Sango found out about this she would kick your ass to high heavens!" Inuyasha growled.

"I didn't do anything wrong! I was just teaching the boy about the creations of a woman's body! I'm teaching him that he should appreciate it" Miroku said knowingly.

" Teach him my ass!" Inuyasha yelled catching a few glares from some parents. They watched the kids until out of nowhere, Taro pulled down his pants and started peeing in the sand box. Kids started running away from him screaming while Haruki stood there looking in curiosity,

" So that's how boys pee..." she mumbled. Inuyasha's eyes widened as he saw his daughter make no attempt to run away but _actually_ seemed to watch in curiosity and get closer. He ran to his daughter and picked her up quickly and ran away from the peeing scene. He looked back and saw parents glaring and some really muscular mothers and fathers getting up to lung at Miroku. All the while, Taro was STILL peeing. He put his daughter down and kneeled down to her level.

"Now Haruki, what went through your mind when you saw Taro pee?" He was worried about the answer but he needed to make sure on cleansing any dirty thoughts.

"I was thinking on how boys pee! Boys have wiggly noodles! It looks like noodles that we eat but bigger Daddy! Do you have one Daddy?" She looked at him and he opened his mouth to answer but nothing came out. He was too shocked to say anything. Then his daughter did a VERY awkward thing.

She rubbed his penis.

She smiled real big and said,

"You DO have one Daddy! Can I see it?" Like said before, 'DAMN KIDS AND THEIR QUESTIONS!' He managed to reply with a weak 'no'.

"Why not?"

"I'll let you see it...when you're older..." She seemed satisfied with his answer. At least she was going to see it...

On the way home they passed an ice cream truck.

"Ooooohh...Daddy can I have one pleeeeeeaaaaaase?" She pleaded with puppy dog eyes. He smiled and said,

"I don't see why not?" He totally forgot the note that said not to give her sugar...

* * *

"HARUKI!!!! STOP RUNNING ON THE WALLS!!!" He yelled. He slapped his forehead. Man, he should have remembered the note. The instant he got home, Haruki went MAD! She ran into the kitchen in demonic speed that if you saw her it seemed like a flash. She bathed herself in pudding and the lasagne dinner. Then she started running all over the house, leaving a mess at every step. She raided almost every room in the house and turned them upside down, ate three of her mom's lipsticks and 7 lip gloss tubes, and put ice under her father's shoes and started skating around the tile kitchen like figure skating. Now she somehow learned how to run all over the walls. Wait... now it's the ceiling too! Inuyasha chased her around everywhere! All of the sudden in the middle of the ceiling she collapsed with gravity's force pulling her down. Inuyasha dived in and caught her safely before she hit the ground.

Her breathing is calm so she must be sleeping. He just sat on the couch and watched her sleep. Whenever you hear the question 'how hard can babysitting be?'

Well now, you know your answer...

* * *

Later that night...

Kagome entered the house and sighed tiredly. Apparently Naraku only wanted to brag to her about how well his company was going. He let her off early so she decided to come home. She dropped her bag down and her eyes immediately landed on the two figures sleeping on the couch. Haruki was extremely messy with lasagne and pudding and so was Inuyasha. She made a mental not to scold them for that. There was Inuyasha with his arms wrapped tightly around little Haruki. It was an extremely cute sight to see. She walked over to them and she brushed away Inuyasha's bangs form his face. She sighed but both their hanyou ears twitched. Kagome held her squeal and turned around. Her eyes widened on tithe sight held before her.

"INNNNUUUUUUUUUUUUUUYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHAAAAAAA!!!!!"

* * *

Hoped ya liked it

Sweetz Sugerz Body


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